Some Election Thoughts

We are in the heart of election season and the campaigns are at full strength. And since I'm kind of annoyed by both candidates right now (seriously, quit calling the other guy names and talk about YOUR plans/policies), I thought I'd get a few thoughts about the important choices off my chest. So, here are my election thoughts....Star Wars style.

I found these T-shirts from zazzle.com which I think are awesome. They are campaign style shirts telling you to vote for __________ in '08. I'm going to rank my preference of candidates, based on their shirts. Go here if you want to buy (or look) for yourself.

In dramatic descending order....

15. Asaij Ventress
Bald chicks that can kick my butt don't generally get my vote. However, awesome dual lightsaber skills is strangely hot....but still, I'll pass. I really don't think she has the best interest of the galaxy at heart.

14. Ahsoka
While this Jedi padawan would have the best interest of all, she is just too inexperienced to fill the ticket. Now if someone wanted to pander to the feminist and the Jedi base, they could pick a young, inexperienced female and talk her up without any actual record to stand on...but who would do something like that.

13. General Grievous Grievous can't get my vote because is nothing but a puppet. He never made independent decisions, but just did as he was told. An independent thinker is required to hold the most powerful office in the galaxy.

12. Boba Fett
The problem with Fett is he exclusively looks out for himself and not others. However, his cool appearance does bump him up the list a bit. Also, he would raise some important questions about the rights of clones.

11. Anakin Skywalker
I'm not sure the campaign slogan "There's Still Good in Him" is really the way to go. Who wants that much teen angst in the driver seat anyway? Once Anakin comes into his own, then he might be vote worthy.

10. Emperor Palpatine
Well, of all the candidates we have the most hands on experience with how Palpatine will rule. He is a conniving, devious, piece of Sith. Certainly wouldn't be good for the galaxy, but you have to respect his credentials and ability to get things done. (Please don't shoot force lightning at me.)

9. C-3PO and R2-D2
Apparently 3PO thought he could run on his own as evident by this campaign poster. 3PO is too indecisive and cowardly to lead the way. Plus, his slogan ("Fluent in over 6-million forms of communication") seems like he is running for press secretary or something.
An apparent re-ordering of the ticket makes the droids more ideal. R2-D2 certainly is the better of the two to lead, and this way 3PO could translate all his executive orders. My problem is that R2-D2 is a little too rash. While experience tells it that it works out, I don't really like the idea of someone who ignores most rational thought and does whatever he (she or it) wants.

8. Luke Skywalker
Military experience, war hero, good, and has true understanding of what it is like to be the little guy in the Outer Rim. The problem is he is just too bleepin' whiny. Give him a few more years to age (but not yet be senile) and he'll be ready to lead the entire galaxy.

7. Princess Leia
Experienced and very pleasant on the eyes. Seriously, if she would debate or campaign in Jabba slave gear, every male would be voting for her. She also is appealing to the plight of the galaxy, "This is Our Most Desperate Hour." A proven leader who deserves your consideration.

6. Chewbacca
This vote is exclusively due to Chewbacca's coolness. Really, Chewie is a solid right hand man, but has shown little inkling to actually lead. The slogan however does hold some weight, "Let the Wookie Win." You might want to consider this.

5. Han Solo
A better scruffy-looking nerf herder there is not. He talks a mighty game about doing the best for himself, but he always comes around to the best interest of others. With Chewie on the ticket, you get one of the best duos in the universe. Sadly, I'm afraid this maverick wouldn't work with others as well as you might think. Politically scary slogan would be, "I Shot First".

4. Admiral Ackbar
A darkhorse in the election. He came from relative obscurity, but has proven to be an exceptional leader. He certainly has the cajohnes for the job. I doubt any other candidate would recommend engaging a Super-Star Destroyer at close range. Might make a better Secretary of State, but still worth consideration. "It's Not a Trap"

3. Obi-Wan Kenobi
"He's Our Only Hope"...what a great slogan. Youthful (as portrayed), but wise beyond his years. A good heart and would certainly surround himself with wise counsel (Yoda and Mace Windu certainly in the running for cabinet positions). Has a bit of a rebellious streak, but always sees the big picture and doesn't make rash decisions. Negotiates first, but not afraid to fight when required.

2. Yoda
If Obi-Wan would be good, Yoda would be great. Despite a lack of size, his wisdom alone could carry the galaxy to years of peace and prosperity. "Do or Do Not. There is No Try." However, he lacks a certain charisma and doesn't really inspire. Age is a factor...how long could he serve before slipping into senility?

So, my vote goes to...

1. Darth Vader
He has the coolest campaign poster and the coolest slogan. "Together We Can Rule the Galaxy" See he wants you to help. He's not in it for himself, but wants you to come along for the ride. Plus, rumor has it, "There's Still Good in Him." And he'll force choke you if you don't vote for him. Vader '08!!!

Ok, seriously, I have spent some time thinking about the upcoming election and will likely drop some of those thoughts on you. I am looking forward to the debates between Obama and McCain. Hopefuly we can actually here issues and plans, not just rhetoric and name calling. Until then, I'm sticking with my man, Vader. Rumor has it, he has one more promise....cookies.